Openness and vulnerability does not only come from sharing your past. It’s also found in communicating what you would like to see moving forward.

“Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection.” – Brené Brown

When we think about vulnerability, we often think of oversharing about our past traumas and negative experiences. While this may be helpful in opening ourselves up to people in certain contexts, it is not a necessity when forming connections. Sometimes the past can hold painful memories or feelings that cannot be shared with others. On the other hand, sometimes sharing these experiences empowers us and leads to the development of vulnerability and openness. However, only sharing the past without focusing on the future may be counterproductive in relationships. It is important to transform our past experiences into life lessons for what we need moving forward. 

Start Here:

  1. Think about your past experiences, thoughts, and emotions, and use these to identify your current and future needs.

  2. Once you identify your needs, create boundaries for yourself. For example, this can look like physical boundaries, sexual boundaries, financial boundaries, or other non-negotiable boundaries.

  3. While forming or deepening connections with others, practice vulnerability by sharing the past but also conveying your needs and boundaries moving forward.

Focusing on the future and communicating our needs and boundaries with others allows us to practice self-care and ensure we protect ourselves. This also encourages healthy and open communication in relationships, further strengthening our connections.

Author- Sharva Katagi

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